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| Supersonic Eye Openers to Sharpen Your Type A Smarts |
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Lisa Dee: Power Off the Scale
“We had to dig the chickens out of three feet of snow yesterday.”
I chuckle at the surprising vision of this Type A power player shoveling snow while the chickens crow.
“I built my first company with a $5000 loan from my parents. I built it up to a $24 million dollar company.”
With Lisa Dee surprises are the name of the game. But Lisa’s story is not the typical Type A tale of big bank accounts and big egos. It’s about much more than tarnished trophies.
From Singapore to Johannesburg to New York, this Type A serial entrepreneur has called many places home. Today, Lisa is snuggled in Vista Caballo, her remote Colorado ranch.
“Vista Caballo is company number three. I ask myself, ‘How do I want to do this one differently?’ I did a pretty good number on myself with the first two.”
Surrounded by the beauty left by the recent blizzard, Lisa begins to tell me how she traded her $24 million trophy for digging out chickens, mucking stalls and unlocking other lives trapped in success.
Lisa Dee cut her entrepreneurial teeth in the highly competitive advertising industry. Along the way she and her team weathered 9/11, ran offices in New York, Dallas and San Francisco and developed a highly successful business model that was emulated by others across the industry.
There’s no doubt she’s a Type A top gun.
I ask Lisa about her own personal experience as a Type A. She pauses and I can feel her diving deep into herself – probing, weighing and considering her answer. This is not a woman who answers quickly or casually.
When the answer arrives, it is punctuated with power and passion. As she speaks, it is easy to see Lisa running that $24M company with ease.
“The first part was just acknowledging that I was a Type A. In reflection, that was the first insight I had into the fact that maybe not everyone was wired like me. I was an A+++ personality. It was such a natural way of being that I wondered to myself, ‘What other types of people are there?’”
You can hear the sincere puzzlement in her voice as she remembers first encountering the novel idea that not everyone was like her.
I hear that so often. Type A’s rarely realize they are Type A’s. They are too busy, too driven and too focused to see who they really are.
“Honestly, the results I got were so positive, I never considered the fact that I was Type A one way or another. It was just a label that didn’t have any meaning to me.”
It’s easy to overlook the Type A warning signs when your eyes are locked on the positive results. We’ve all been down that road a time or two.
“As the stakes got higher, that’s when I started really feeling there was something happening. I didn’t recognize the collateral damage. There started to be schisms, conflicts and also…” her voice trails off, “a wonderful progression. It was confusing. I brought in consultants to help me understand what was happening with my executive team.”
I’m reminded of how hard it is to see the collateral damage when you’re the one creating it. You can’t read the label if you’re inside the bottle.
“The consultants told me – in front of my entire executive team – that I worked at mach speed with my hair on fire. Now, I was very comfortable working that way. It wasn’t a problem for me. On a Friday afternoon, I’d list 17 initiatives I wanted in motion and then wonder, on Monday morning, ‘Where are the results?’. My sense of time was different. I didn’t have weekends. I loved my work. I loved multi-tasking.”
Mix Type A power and passion with a compressed sense of time and high expectations and you’re stirring the fire with a stick of dynamite. It’s just a matter of time before it goes boom.
True to her courageous Type A self, Lisa decided to go the extra step. Little did she realize the doors that would swing open.
“I decided to put myself up for anonymous review by my entire team. I got wonderful feedback like, ‘you’re amazing, incredible, we love your vision, we love your inspiration’. I also got this… ‘But what do we do now? How do we make it happen?’ I realized then that if I was going to write in the sky, I had to build ladders to get there.”
There’s silence on the phone now. Something’s cooking.
“It was a very painful experience. It was heart breaking.”
The pain creates wrinkles in Lisa’s voice as she explains.
“After I sold my companies, I discovered there was much more collateral damage than I realized. If I had known, I would have changed it! My team and my company were my heart and soul. It was excruciating to learn the extent of it. I’m dedicated to being my best. I want to hear what’s not working.”
Isn’t it interesting that we can’t hear the message until it rips the door off the hinges?
Lisa shifts back to the present with conviction.
“I will build this company differently!”
This company is Vista Caballo. It’s Lisa’s third company and a playground for passion and power.
Vista Caballo, an experiential learning center located on a ranch in Dove Creek, Colorado, is where you find your true sense of self. It is where highly accomplished Type A’s unplug, reflect, re-calibrate and re-boot. Lisa’s horses are your teachers. The gorgeous Colorado countryside is your muse and your soul is a blank canvas.
Be warned. It’s not for the faint-hearted or the partially-committed. This isn’t where you sit poolside sipping margaritas while you fiddle with your iPhone. Nope. You’re going to be working in the dirt – both literally and figuratively.
Vista Caballo unlocks your full power and passion so you courageously step into who you are really meant to be. The transformation is positive, profound and, most importantly, permanent. Just the kind of challenging adventure that Type A’s love.
I ask Lisa what advice she has for her Type A brethren. Her answer slices through my question like a Ginsu knife.
“You’ve done it! Acknowledge you’ve done it. You can keep on the linear path. Achieve more. Make bigger creations. But… at some point… you have to recognize you’ve done it.”
The last words are hammered hard.
“I strongly encourage you to take a side-step on your life’s journey. A non-linear path reveals gifts. You can always go back to the linear way of doing things, but a non-linear life will enrich and expand your comfort zone. The linear life is where Type A burnout occurs.”
She stops and I feel her heart and head weaving words together.
“Once we Type A’s can do something with ease, we ask ourselves, ‘Now what?’ When that happens it’s time for us to expand our life. When you find power and passion on a non-linear path, you learn what life is really about.”
It’s clear that this woman who traded her $24 million trophy for digging chickens out of the snow is comfortable free-falling into life.
“The non-linear path is very humbling. The linear experience prepares us for the non-linear experience. The non-linear path is where real power emerges. The linear experience is like practicing piano scales. At some point you have to get off the scales and just play.”
I think about the thousands of Type A’s who are playing a monotonous tune day-after-day as their power and passion fade away.
“Take a chance! If there’s little inkling that there might be a different way to do something, take a chance. You can always go back. You can always say, ‘oops’. I can guarantee that you’ll be richer for that try. You’re going to open a doorway in your life that you’ll never want to close. Open the door. Take one step. It’s time to get messy.”
Lisa’s lesson is clear. Once you take your Type A power off the scale, life changing possibilities appear.
A note to my Type A tribe: Lisa Dee and I are joining forces to rock your Type A world. Stay tuned for an exciting announcement.
Tom Wynne’s Coal Mining Wisdom
Tom Wynne, Chief Operating Officer, Alliance Coal
We’ve all been there. One team member was slacking off and putting the rest of the team at risk.
“That’s when I learned.” Tom leans back in his chair and smiles at the memory. “In the mines, everybody every day says what they are thinking because if they don’t, things get filed. When things get filed… people get hurt.”
Miners don’t mince words. With lives on the line, there’s no room for tip-toeing around egos or sticking your head in the sand.
Tom travels back to his days as a mining engineer fresh out of college.
“I wasn’t a good coal miner. I didn’t know anything about coal mining. I had to say, ‘You guys have to help me.’
Nearly thirty years later, miner’s wisdom still flows through Tom’s veins like black rivers of coal flowing through the earth.
“There is an unbelievable bond among coal miners. They watch out for one another. They have each others’ backs. It’s the culture of the mines.”
You can’t miss the heartfelt respect and deep admiration he has for the men and women who have taught him so much. For Tom Wynne, senior vice president and chief operating officer for Alliance Coal, a publicly traded company with mining operations in five states, the coal miners aren’t simply cogs in a corporate wheel. They are teachers, friends and family.
Tom’s words are punctuated with a warrior’s gritty passion.
“Coal miners face conflict every moment of every day! They have to work together. When it all works, it is so cool! It’s something that you marvel at.”
With an evangelist’s zeal, Tom leans forward and proudly proclaims, “Coal mining is the greatest team sport!”
I chuckle. This last comment, coming from a guy whose office is a modest shrine to the Pittsburgh Steelers, is the ultimate compliment to coal miners.
Our conversation shifts back to conflict. Just like the coal miners, turbocharged Type A’s frequently work in a world filled with conflict and I’m curious what advice Tom has to offer.
“I’m never going to hold back. I’m going to tell you what I think every day. Then we’re going to resolve our differences, make a decision and move on. You have to move on. You can’t afford not to move on.”
Great wisdom for Type A superstars who hold onto conflict like a dog with a bone. Speak your mind. Make a decision. Settle your differences. Turn loose.
I ask Tom how he transforms conflict from a team killer into a team builder. His answer is immediate.
“The secret is in the follow-up. Decisions are going to be made that not everyone agrees with. Admit it. There’s going to be disagreements. You’ve got to make the decision and then follow-up with those who don’t agree with the decision. You’ve got to let them know that their opinions and ideas are important. You’ve got to encourage them to keep bringing it. This decision may not have gone in their favor, but they are important members of this team.”
Tom pauses and then adds, “And you’ve got to admit when you’re wrong. Face it. You’re going to make mistakes. You’ve got to own up to the screw up.”
Own up to the screw up. The simplicity and power of Tom’s words cut right to the issue. It’s so tempting to sweep our screw ups under the rug. Unfortunately, when we sweep, we turn trust into dust.
Coal mining is a tough, 24/7 business. I ask Tom how he handles the pressure.
“Pressure? To me, it’s not really anything. There are lots of worse things than making business decisions. I always look to the positive. Yeah, the mine may be on fire, but all of our people are out and safe. When people can get killed, it helps you keep everything in perspective.”
The miner’s wisdom surfaces again. It’s all about keeping things real.
As our time comes to a close, Tom sums up the most valuable lessons he has learned from deep within the mines.
1. Watch for conflict. You can’t deal with it if you don’t see it.
2. Decisions create conflict. Confront the conflict. If you don’t, you push your people farther and farther away. Don’t let them leave discouraged. Follow up, follow up and follow up.
Thinking back over our conversation, one thing is crystal clear. When things are filed, champs become chumps.
Kelly Flood’s Kitchen Table Wisdom
“I’m such a Type A that I’m even a Type A when I’m decorating my home for the holidays.”
Whip together powerful, passionate and driven. Then stir in warm and thoughtful. Top it all off with a quick sense of humor and a healthy dose of perspective. That describes Type A tribe member, Rev. Kelly Flood, Kentucky State Representative and Vice President for Advancement for Starr King School for the Ministry located in Berkley, CA.
While commuting between California and Kentucky keeps her super busy, Kelly slowed down long enough to share her personal insights regarding the collateral damage so often unwittingly created by turbocharged Type A’s.
“When I was younger, I certainly created collateral damage in my drive to achieve. I finally realized that I didn’t want to spend my energy cleaning up the collateral damage I created. I want to spend my energy working for the greater good in society. How I spend my energy is a motivator for me.”
Kelly slips into thought and then adds, “Earlier in my life, it would infuriate me when my family and friends would tell me to calm down. I felt like they were telling me to shut up. Then I realized that calming down was really about learning to direct my energy. When I direct my energy, I’m able to achieve without creating collateral damage.”
A knowing smile creeps across Kelly’s face. “Passion can cloud perspective. Discernment of passions is wisdom.”
I ask Kelly what she does at this point in her life to avoid creating collateral damage.
“First and most importantly, I keep compassion for myself. That reminds me to have compassion for my enemies. By having compassion for my enemies, it prevents me from seeing them as demons and doing harm to them.”
“Secondly, don’t always believe what you tell yourself. I have a tendency to believe myself too quickly. When you feel passionately about something it’s easy to believe what you tell yourself. I’m always trying to engage my critical mind by asking, ‘What’s the rest of the story?’ I’ve learned to listen for the thoughts that cause trouble like… ‘I deserve….’ or ‘I’ve worked hard…’ These thoughts get my attention that I may be undermining myself.”
We talk for a few minutes about how collateral damage isn’t always about other people. Very often, Type A collateral damage is internal. It’s the consequences of allowing our passion and drive to push us beyond what’s healthy for our bodies. This internal collateral damage can be the most difficult for hard-driving Type A’s to see until it takes a big toll on our well-being.
“It’s so easy to deny what our bodies’ messages are,” Kelly observes. “We choose not to listen because we are on such an enormous high from living the passion-infused life.”
So, what advice does Kelly have for Type A tribe members who want to avoid creating collateral damage?
Kelly thinks long and hard before answering. You can see her critical mind weighing each thought for merit.
“You need to be connected to:
1. Your self.
2. Your family, as you choose to define it.
3. A mission in life that feeds your soul.
4. Friends who will tell you the truth.
“In the past, I created collateral damage when I behaved as if I was not connected to anything… when I did not own my accountability…when I acted like an island.”
With a mischievous sparkle in her eye, Kelly quickly adds in a playful voice, “We Type A’s can be very independent! We like to do things by ourselves.”
Kelly’s expression softens as she gazes through her kitchen window into her garden. “At this point in my life, I’ve come to treasure moments of serenity.”
I ask Kelly what serenity means for her.
“Serenity is the ability to know – wholly – that life is great. Just being alive is great. I am so glad to be a human being that is alive.”
One thing is really clear. For this powerful and passionate woman, discernment of passions is more than wisdom. It’s serenity.
A Four Letter Word
Why do you think so many smart and talented Type A superstar athletes fumble their exit from the playing field?
Simple. They can’t wrap their Type A hard-driving, ambitious, competitive minds around “exiting” a game at which they have always excelled. They can’t envision anything fun and exciting for themselves beyond the next snap of the football.
There’s nothing sadder than watching a former superstar slowly sink into mediocrity simply because he or she didn’t create a great exit strategy. Mickey Rourke did a splendid job of taking us down that dark rabbit hole as Randy “The Ram” Robinson in the award -winning movie, The Wrestler.
For many top performing Type A’s the word “exit” is a four letter word subconsciously synonymous with losing or quitting. Type A’s don’t like to lose or quit so it’s tough for us to wrap our minds around intentionally exiting.
Admit it. At first blush, exiting sounds so bleak and – dare I say – terminal. Talking about developing your exit strategy feels a little like planning your own funeral – something that is pragmatic but not particularly fun and exciting.
Nothing could be further from the truth.
A well crafted exit strategy is actually the launching pad for your dreams. It keeps you manning the controls and calling the shots. It gives you the freedom and resources to launch a new business venture, pursue your “dream” career, travel around the world, join the Peace Corps or give your beloved business baby another 50, 75 or 100 years of life. All it takes is envisioning a compelling new future and working with an exit strategy architect like my good friend and financial planner, Scott Neal.
I’ve worked with many Type A top performers to create a compelling vision of their future and then turn that vision into a reality. One example is Merrill Williams. She exited a successful career in public relations on the west coast to launch her dream on the east coast, Maine Food & Lifestyle magazine.
Don’t let your default exit strategy be dying at your desk with your nose against the grindstone. Dare to think beyond your current success to envision something even better.
What’s next for you?
Oops! Your Slip is Showing.
“If I could, I would take this @#$%&@* ball and shove it down your @#$%&@* throat.”
“You lie!”
In the heat of the moment and fueled by passion, Type A top performers are notorious for short circuiting between their brains and their lips. Like Mt. Vesuvius belching lava, uncensored thoughts explode and rain down on unsuspecting bystanders who are left shaking their heads and asking, “What just happened?!”. Tennis superstar Serena Williams and Representative Joe Wilson (R-SC) are just the two latest apologetic examples.
When asked later if she was threatening the judge, Serena’s candid confession illustrates the spontaneous nature of this Type A explosion.
“No, I didn’t threaten. I didn’t say…I don’t remember anymore, to be honest. I was in the moment.”
Serena was caught in the Type A Moment. What’s your story? When have you been caught in the Type A Moment? Were you the unsuspecting bystander or the belching behemoth?
I’ve personally experienced this eruption on both sides of the equation. And I can tell you, it’s not pretty. Like the time I blew up at my high school track coach and told her she was STUPID. Let’s just say that I found myself in a penance pentathlon…for months.
I’ve coached hundreds of Type A top performers on how to avoid Type A Moments and how to apologize after a volcanic slip.
To sidestep your own Type A Moment, zip your lips before your passion slips. This sounds easy but can actually be quite difficult when you are under intense pressure and filled with high octane passion. The secret? Knowing what triggers cause you to explode and then deactivating the little buggers with a cool and calm brain.
One last note for those of you who are wondering why I didn’t mention Kanye West’s calculated micro-tantrum at the MTV Video Music Awards. His outburst smelled too premeditated to fall into this category. Think about it. He actually had to stand up, jump onto the stage, grab the mike and deliver a speech. There was plenty of time for him to hit the ‘do I really want to do this?’ button. And don’t try to tell me that it was mere coincidence that his conniption fit occurred just before Kanye was scheduled to appear on Jay Leno’s new TV show’s premier. It’s too stinky to be truly spontaneous. We’ll explore Kanye’s dirty trick in another blog. Stay tuned.
Looking for a Bigger Piece of the Pie?
I recently caught up with Greg Lippert, CEO of Mazzio’s Italian Eatery, the Tulsa-based restaurant company with 170 locations in 10 states. From his days as a college soccer player to positions with heavyweights like Proctor and Gamble and Philip Morris, Greg came up through the ranks in typical Type A fashion eventually holding several executive positions in the fast casual dining sector before returning to Mazzio’s as CEO.
As we were kicking around the latest and greatest happenings in our worlds, I took the opportunity to ask Greg to share his advice for those Type A’s who are looking to move into executive leadership.
Here’s Greg’s advice on how to get a bigger piece of the pie.
1. You must know how to manage your time and your mind.
“As CEO, the toughest choice is knowing how to best manage your time and your mind. As you get higher and higher on the ladder, you give up more and more of your time and your mind to issues that you may not have previously considered. You must be constantly thinking about the results of others… the morale of employees, how the company is advancing, whether or not the business plan is accomplishing the company’s goals. It’s no longer about your own results. You have less and less brain space to focus on yourself or your family. If you can’t manage your time and your mind, you’re not going to be successful.”
2. Understand the financial impact of your decisions across the board.
“You are only as good as your bottom line. More and more often pay is being tied to performance. And it’s not just your performance but the entire company’s performance. The company’s financial responsibility is shared responsibility.”
3. Explore your career and lifestyle options early in your career.
“Use your education years and the time in your 20′s to explore opportunities in lifestyle and career that you believe will help you feel fulfilled today and into the future. Don’t make a commitment too early. Find a career or industry that you will still enjoy years later. And develop a secondary interest, such as a hobby or volunteer work, so you don’t become too job focused.”
4. Learn project management skills.
“The biggest gap we have between our experienced baby boomer leadership team and the next generation is strong project management skills. No one is being taught project management. Someone who has great project management skills will be invaluable to growing companies.”
Digging Deep for Black Gold
A big congratulations to Mark Bronston, CEO of Legends Exploration LP located in Houston, TX. Mark, along with a team of fellow scientists, received the prestigious 2009 Prospectors and Developers Association of Canada’s Thayer Lindsley Award for the discovery of the Donlin Creek gold deposit, considered to be one of the largest umined pure gold deposits in the world.
During a recent conversation with Mark, I asked this award-winning geophysicist what are the toughest decisions he has to make as CEO. Mark replied, “The toughest decisions are the people-related issues ranging from dealing with regulatory agencies to negotiating with landowners to keeping everyone motivated, enthusiastic and collegial. It never goes away.”
In Mark’s opinion, the oil and gas exploration business attracts a certain kind of people – “Type A people on steriods” – who, at the end of the day, can handle a big failure with nothing to show for their efforts but a dry hole.
Mark offered some advice for high potential Type A’s who have their eyes on the top job.
1. Be absolutely sure you love what you are doing. Don’t let money be your driver.
2. Early in your career seek out the programs and learning opportunities that may not be the most glamorous but will help you create a strong foundation that will set you apart from your peers. Don’t shy away from the blocking and tackling positions.
3. Save yourself some heartache. When you get angry or affronted, hold your breath and count to ten. Consider that email you want to send before you send it. Act professionally regardless of how you feel.
Great advice from a modern day prospector.
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It’s time to wake up and smell the truth. Like gas guzzling relics, traditional Type A’s are becoming passé. In the good ole’ days, with their steely-eyed focus and turbo-charged tactics, Type A’s could dominate the game by slicing, dicing and sacrificing. That pricey party is over. Award-winning executive coach Kay Cannon offers a funny insider’s look into the secret world of top performing Type A individuals and redefines how these talented and smart superstars can get great results without collateral damage.